


Whisper to the Stars

by hawkeyeandthewintersoldier



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: 5+1 Things, Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M, New Year's Eve, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-25
Updated: 2020-12-25
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:22:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28315953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hawkeyeandthewintersoldier/pseuds/hawkeyeandthewintersoldier
Summary: 5 times Steve spends New Year's Eve without Bucky and 1 time he spends New Year's Eve with Bucky.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers
Comments: 5
Kudos: 19





	Whisper to the Stars

**Author's Note:**

> Here's a quick New Year's Fic. I had a lot of fun using the 5 + 1 format! 
> 
> Unbeta'd, my apologies for any mistakes. 
> 
> If you like this ficlet, please consider leaving kudos or a comment. It genuinely means the world to me! 💕

**1.**

It feels a little disingenuous, Steve thinks, wishing everyone whose path he crosses a happy new year. He's not happy and every time he closes his eyes he worries he will end up 70 years into the future again. All he can think about is everything he has lost. The crushing loneliness that engulfs him. He spends New Year's Eve on his own. Somewhere in the middle of nowhere. It's better that way. At least nothing can remind him of the people he lost here. At least, here, he doesn't see Bucky's face on every corner. 

"Happy New Year," Steve whispers to the stars and he hopes Bucky will hear somehow. 

**2.**

It's his second year out of the ice. He's gotten used to the future. Kind of. He's adapting but certain things are still jarring. Some days it feels like he is in a foreign country. Its language unfamiliar. Its expressions strange to him. He's learning the words but he will never fully comprehend them. He considers spending New Year's Eve on his own again but then Natasha invites him to spend the night with her. He says yes. 

She's his friend. Out of all the people he knows, she comes closest to understanding what he went through. They are both strangers in this strange land they claim as their own. Though he still feels lonely, it's better to feel lonely with another person by his side. 

**3.**

Steve and Sam have been on the road for months now. Bucky is alive. That's all Steve knows. And even that he can't say with certainty. He hasn't seen him since the helicarriers went down. 

It's New Year's Eve. Sam's bringing Steve to his mom's house for his family's annual celebration. They'll continue their search later. It hurts like hell to ring in the new year without Bucky. Even more than that first year on his own. Knowing Bucky is out there somewhere and not in Steve’s arms is killing him. He hopes they will find Bucky soon. Sometimes he thinks they never will. 

**4.**

This is the closest Steve has gotten to spending New Year's Eve with Bucky in years and he's still on his own. He hadn't been happy about Bucky going into cryo but he understood. He wouldn't have stopped him anyway. It was Bucky's decision and he hasn't had the chance to make many of those in the last few decades. Still, it hurts. 

The stars in the Wakandan night sky are bright. Steve asks them to let him spend New Year's Eve together with Bucky next year. He doesn’t know if they will listen. At least he can rest peacefully here. If that's the best he can get he'll take it. 

**5.**

Steve is spending New Year's Eve at the compound with Nat, though neither of them feel like celebrating. It feels wrong to with half the world missing. He should have never asked to spend New Year's Eve with Bucky. He should have known the universe would never let him. Bucky's always out of reach. And no matter how much Steve longs for him, he will never get to have him. It's cruel. It hurts. He's so tired. 

Some days he feels like giving up. He thinks he would have if it wasn't for Nat and her endless strength and support. Having her is a mercy. The only one the world has given him.

**+1.**

"What do you want to do for New Year's Eve?" Bucky asks as he’s washing the dishes. 

They saved the world a few months ago and he and Steve moved into their brownstone in Brooklyn not long after. Living with each other has been wonderful, even if Bucky's socks never seem to make it into the laundry basket. Some things never change. 

"I don't care as long as I'm with you," Steve answers Bucky's question. 

"Sap," Bucky grins. 

"It's true though." Steve kisses Bucky's cheek. "But if you're going to make me choose, I know a place we can go." 

Bucky does make him choose. So on New Year's Eve Steve drives them to the middle of nowhere. The same place he went all those years ago. He thanks the stars. He wishes his boyfriend a 'Happy New Year' and kisses him. It’s the first time in a long time Steve thinks the coming year might actually be good. Even if it isn't, he has Bucky here with him now. That makes all the difference. 

**Author's Note:**

> Come say hi to me or shout about Stucky, if you want to! I am also hawkeyeandthewintersoldier on tumblr 💕


End file.
